atupid

my supposed entry got erased, i hit the save and publish button but well, thank you netopia for an efficient service, the internet sucked up and refreshed the page, turning my entry into nothingness... Thank you very much for making my day... Luckily, i have nothing to do, so i might as well, do another one... In my "dead-long-gone-entry" i was talking about trying to get past the backpacks and slingbags... Im still hooked up with the after college blues and somehow im trying my best to act like some professional person. But i still dress like some bum at times when I go to malls and swing my sling bag on my shoulders when i feel like it�on some school day. Im not yet used to dressing up in our teacher uniform, which by the way , i dont want to get caught wearing by any batchmate. People i meet on the way would always get shocked when i tell them that im a teacher and my landlord and landlady have always been amazed by the idea that i already work and yet still look like a� student. Itapos;s nice to look back on those days of attending classes and chatting with classmates especially now that my world has been turned upside down. I aint the student anymore but the one who stands infront of them and instructing them what to do. I can no longer sleep in class or go out whenever i feel bored or skip class. I have somehow transformed into someone cautious and with limits, especially when little watchful eyes and ears turn on me. I no longer�wake up dreading to�attend some major subject but i wake up thinking about my students and whatever i would teach them on that day. �iam not the one who calls the teacher but im the one� being called now.� i have been recently stuck on the bus in charge of a bunch of primary students on a school field trip, and this is the first time in my life that i have suddenly longed to go home after just a few minutes. I could hear the words "teacher rose�" like every minute. When we got to this clubhouse, my boys were running loose and they would shout to me and pretend to jump in the pool. I spent the whole time running after them, calling their attention, making sure they dont get bored and praying that nobody gets hurt. After we got off the bus at the end of the day, i almost kissed the school ground and thank god that it was all over. I was literally worn out and spent from a dayapos;s tour. But it was great, being able to handle that amount of responsibility, i have to say im a little proud of myself there (hahaha).. Makes me feel a little bit like an adult... Oooh well... Bottom line is this is a new world for me and im still adjusting to it while missing "rose the student"... But well, itapos;s life, we got to move on and just have fun along the way... There are still some mornings when i want to wake up to the chill of the baguio breeze and peek out the foggy window in titaapos;s house but i guess lately there are more mornings when i wake up and i think about those kids... Those kids who could suck up all your energy in just one go and yet you wont be able to be truly mad at them especially when they show you their "cute puppy eye look" (or the cute puss in boots look in shrek) which could really get into you...

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